darren jennings

jarboejennings.tumblr.com

2010-09-06T14:43:00.000-07:00

Blogging is really hard, but if you have a fancy phone that takes pictures, then you can upload said pictures and not write anything...and more people will follow you because your new blog no longer requires mental taxation.

Approach My Soul The Mercy Seat

2010-04-07T18:18:00.000-07:00

Approach my soul the Mercy Seat
Where Elohim and the illicit meet
There fall before my Judge's feet
Thy promises my only plea,
Oh God.

Send wings to lift the clutch of sin
You who dwell between the cherubim
From war without, and fear within,
relieve the grief from the shoulders of crumbling men

Oh God, pour out your clemency to me
My God oh what striking love to bleed

Fashion this heart in Your alchemy
with the brass to front the devil's perjury
and sure fire grace my Jesus speaks
I must I will I do believe,
Oh God.

Oh God, pour out your clemency to me

My God oh what striking love to bleed.

Based on the Hymn by John Newton, adapted by Jamie Barnes. Listen with a humble heart.

Engagement Photos

2010-03-09T09:12:00.000-08:00

I recently got a girl to agree to marry me(man her hair looks good in that pic...! especially juxtaposed with my nasty self). We didn't think we'd get engagement pictures because of money issues, but one of our friends, Joanna Miller volunteered to snap pictures on her fancy camera for free. She did a good job. I'm thankful for her taking the time to capture some photons.some of my fav's:

Oh! And Kenny and Kristin (Smith) had the opportunity to get a wicked awesome photographer, Juan Maclean, who is also my favorite person to drink Elector with. Check out their teaser photos here!

That Temporary Engagement*

2009-12-26T10:20:00.000-08:00

May Christ get the glory as we say goodbye to our childish ways.

*the blog title is a tribute to this book.

xkcd

2009-12-01T14:08:00.000-08:00

Having worked in the HEP lab, I've been exposed to a substantial amount of webcomics and videos and the like. Most highly respected of these is xkcd. It's proven itself worthy to stay on my google tiled top sites homepage even. You can find most answers you're looking for about the artist at http://xkcd.com/about/ such as what his favorite astronomical entity is. He also hosts a picture gallery of people on roller coasters playing chess inspired by this comic. A recent comic win:

1 year

2009-11-30T19:29:00.000-08:00

"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised. (Proverbs 31:30)"

I picked this verse because I don't use cliche verses often, so when I do, I mean it.

I adore this girl. She's more beautiful with each day.

The Particle Zoo

2009-11-16T14:00:00.000-08:00

On the 10/30/09 colloquium talk at the University of Louisville, Heidi Schellman came discussing her research on the Higgs particle at Fermilab. I had the privilege to eat lunch with her at the Speed Art museum with a group of students and faculty, as well as listen to her talk about particle physics at SPS and talk on her research at the colloquium.

Then opening her treasures, she offered us gifts of many flavors (see Matthew 2:11). Bearing gifts, meaning she brought in products from the particle zoo, a self-proclaimed "sweatshop of one" dedicated to making plush particle confections. Below is the dark matter being presented in a display of the piping at CERN.

A description of the Higgs on the particle zoo:

The Higgs Boson is the theoretical particle of the Higgs mechanism, which physicists believe will reveal how all matter in the universe get its mass. Many scientists hope that the Large Hadron Collider in Geneva, Switzerland will detect the elusive Higgs Boson when it begins colliding particles at 99.99% the speed of light. Wool felt with gravel fill for maximum mass. $9.75 plus shipping.

my lab website

2009-11-10T16:46:00.000-08:00

Enjoy my HEP(high energy physics) lab website ... complete with contact information, tutorials and kitty cats. Oh and sorry ... no high energy physics just yet. BUT WAIT! THERE'S MORE! (Dr. B reference), I'll be sure to get up some high energy things before too long. I know you're all waiting very patiently.

Sufjan Stevens is the one I love

2009-10-15T23:56:00.000-07:00

"All good naysayers" is a great site for tracking anything sufjan related. They didn't have much to say for a while due to sufjan's ability to avoid the limelight, but alas, he's on tour again and performing new songs along with the BQE, which releases next tuesday, October 20th, 2009. It's a must have, and a great present for good friends who love sufjan.

The One I Love from: All the Way from Michigan Not Mars from factory twenty five on Vimeo.

Designated Deriver

2009-10-01T21:02:00.000-07:00

So with the help of jarboe and tyler deeb this is what will be going on the math tee shirt. I was pleased with it. Jarboe and I drew on a chalkboard and then Tyler edited it. Ever since I bought this interstates shirt, I have continually enjoyed and appreciated the aesthetic of words being too long to fit on one line. Tyler is great at this. It'll be cool to represent the math department, while appreciating the shirt. i.e. it'll be cool to be in denial about being a nerd.

10 Months

2009-09-23T13:23:00.000-07:00

7 MONTHS

2009-06-29T17:20:00.000-07:00

39 days

2009-01-07T21:57:00.000-08:00

Life's busy, but I can at least come here to tell you that Christ has blessed me...

how inscrutable are His ways.

the Truth has set me free

2008-10-10T22:27:00.000-07:00

Christ has done a good work in me, of which he will finish.

nostalgia

mugged!

2008-09-30T17:41:00.001-07:00

Okay so I just got hit with a broomstick and punched in the face by some gang of kids whilst riding my bike to UofL. I got away! Man the Lord is good!

entrepreneurial conditions take us to glory

2008-09-20T12:28:00.000-07:00

This blog post exists to express what plans I wish to carry out in the coming years of my life as a professional student, a member of a local church, a cg leader and above all other identities, a disciple of the Lord Jesus Christ; in light of the gospel and these passages:

"The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. (Proverbs 16:9)"
"For the Lord of hosts has purposed, and who will annul it? His hand is stretched out, and who will turn it back? (Isaiah 14:27)"
"The Lord brings the counsel of the nations to nothing; he frustrates the plans of the peoples. 11 The counsel of the Lord stands forever,the plans of his heart to all generations. (Psalm 33:10-11)"
8 For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, 9 not a result of works, so that no one may boast. 10 For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them. (Ephesians 2:8-10)

My thoughts turn towards these things:
Community Group
REU (Research Experience for Undergrads)
earning a PhD in Physics (OSU?)
moving cities, thus leaving Sojourn
Veritas Community Church, i.e. The Nyes

Thinking towards my future is both exciting and frustrating. I have a trepidation concerning how a career in physics might steer my life; being woven into academia while representing the supremacy of Christ, that He is Lord of all, and still finding value in an occupation. I find great comfort in the truth that Christ is venerated even through seemingly menial tasks, and all things considered I think I will find great fulfillment and joy in the world of academia.
I will be applying to some REU's this coming summer 09. I will most likely be gone for 10 weeks researching and working in a lab and living in a foreign city on a University Campus. This is good for experience but looks phenomenal on a resume for grad school. And if I can manage to get into OSU's REU then I can be recognized within the department prior to going there (or decide against it as my school of choice). The Lord is Sovereign.

I wanna get a PhD. I'm not sure what that's going to look like....I'm mainly just thinking it's going to be really hard...and that's my thought on that. It will look more and more tangible as I'm picking grad schools and furthering my knowledge of what I want to study.

Aside from my plans to further my education, I have a desire to be the church scattered, in North America. This mainly stems from seeing so many of my peers leaving Sojourn to advance the gospel in church planting. The Nyes in Columbus are consistently on my mind when I'm asked what I want to do when I go to grad school. But along with this desire to help church plant, I have a coupled sense of fear that moving cities will be accompanied by a lack of companionship with a woman. This fear is not merited for a man of my youth, but I hope I just won't be so lonely when I leave. Oh and I strongly wish to multiply, i.e. procreate. The Lord is Sovereign.

Take us to glory (that is God, not entrepreneurial conditions)...I think about it now...

I apologize but, it would be anticlimactic for my newest blog not to allude to a Sufjan Stevens song.

free offer of the gospel

2008-06-26T00:24:00.000-07:00

"God not only delights in the penitent but is also moved by the riches of his goodness and mercy to desire the repentance and salvation of the impenitent and reprobate."

I am convinced this is true.

Are We Innocent? Acts 18:5-11

2008-02-21T12:26:00.000-08:00

"5 When Silas and Timothy arrived from Macedonia, Paul was occupied with the word, testifying to the Jews that the Christ was Jesus. 6 And when they opposed and reviled him, he shook out his garments and said to them, “Your blood be on your own heads! I am innocent. From now on I will go to the Gentiles.” 7 And he left there and went to the house of a man named Titius Justus, a worshiper of God. His house was next door to the synagogue. 8 Crispus, the ruler of the synagogue, believed in the Lord, together with his entire household. And many of the Corinthians hearing Paul believed and were baptized. 9 And the Lord said to Paul one night in a vision, “Do not be afraid, but go on speaking and do not be silent, 10 for I am with you, and no one will attack you to harm you, for I have many in this city who are my people.” 11 And he stayed a year and six months, teaching the word of God among them. (Acts 18:5-11)"

Here I am again in Acts, and again it sparks multiple arenas of thought. I mean, firstly I look at this text and I it shows me a couple things that I presuppose going into any text I read.
A. Paul isn't impeccable. I like to see him in my mind (and many other biblical figures) as a perfect man, but he's a sinner, for "I[Christ] have come to call not those who think they are righteous, but those who know they are sinners. (Mark 2:17) " Christ called Paul, but he knows he's a sinner.
B. I judge Paul and feel as if his actions weren't up to par with the gospel. I mean, preaching to Jews and giving up on them and claiming that he is innocent? It's a weighty claim, but he does so in boldness. I love that about Paul. He says things and means them. When we were doing Romans 1 at Sojourn, we read Paul claims, "9 For God is my witness, whom I serve with my spirit in the gospel of his Son, that without ceasing I mention you 10 always in my prayers, asking that somehow by God's will I may now at last succeed in coming to you. (Romans 9-10)" Without ceasing? Even in hyperbole I would feel uncomfortable writing that about my own church.

But as I am looking at my own realm of people I am attempting to proclaim the gospel to, I ask myself, am I innocent of their blood? Do they hear and their hearts become hardened, or am I just lacking the simple effort that it takes to speak to them on behalf of Christ? I love people, and if I really love them, I'll be real with them. Forgive me for being so fake.

I went outside last night in the freezing weather and watched the total lunar eclipse. I got to a part in the middle of my suburban neighborhood where there was a great distance between me and houses on either sides of me. From this position the vast expanse above stretched a great deal in all directions without much hindering me from seeing as much as I wanted. It's pretty hard to see stars usually but I had luck with last night and I couldn't see any clouds. The Lunar eclipse reminded me of how, the older I get, the more fascinating everything seems to be. Years ago, I could have cared less that the earth was blotting out the moon, but last night it was awesome.

I'm in love...

2008-02-06T20:34:00.000-08:00

with a song about a bird and I don't know what to do.

for sufjan covering REM
http://www.myspace.com/darrensaysyes

God's Invisible Qualities in a Physical World

2008-01-10T20:35:00.000-08:00

"19For what can be known about God is plain to them, because God has shown it to them. 20For his invisible attributes, namely, his eternal power and divine nature, have been clearly perceived, ever since the creation of the world, in the things that have been made. So they are without excuse. (Romans 1:19-20)"

Passages like this send hope into my world. Every year on this earth, man is seeing the majestic work of God in His creation. Studying physics is amazing. Humans have tried to analyze the physical world for so long (many for different reasons searching for answers, knowledge, money, "the common good" etc.), and from every angle there is a resounding YES to intelligent design. This is arguable, but how can you examine the vast expanse above or the subatomic particles of a atom or the chemicals in a leaf turning rays of light into oxygen... or the human body! and not recognize their perfect, complex and intricate nature without paying homage to something greater. I don't speak as if everyone should know and cherish this truth, as many, even most do not! It's always advantageous to know, that part of every human being devises ways or schemes or ideals to make themselves feel better or above another. BUT WE KNOW THE TRUTH do we not? Be careful. Arrogance in knowing the truth is different then speaking it in love. Discern truth, love God, love others.

I enjoyed a phrase Richard Feynman coined in 1974 called "Cargo Cult Science." He instructed his graduated students "The first principle is that you must not fool yourself—and you are the easiest person to fool. So you have to be very careful about that. After you've not fooled yourself, it's easy not to fool other scientists. You just have to be honest in a conventional way after that." He got the phrase from Cargo Cults which are essentially cultures who adopt beliefs in cargo, specifically in indigenous peoples, where they worship and hold foreign cargo (guns, radios, technology etc.) as spiritual items to be desired and worshiped. It's common to see these people groups as millenarianist, believing that the coming of these goods will bring an eventual positive period of time to be hoped for, not dissimilar to what we see in Christianity, as we hope for eternal life in heaven in the coming of King Jesus.

We can see 'Cargo Cult Science' in the experiment to measure the electric charge of an electron in 1909. The 'Oil-drop' experiment used drops of oil suspended by an electric field between two metal electrodes. Robert Millikan conducted this experimented and calculated the elementary charge, which he concluded to be about 1.5924(17) x 10⁻¹⁹ coulombs (the 17 in parentheses represents the uncertainty), when after so long we have come to know the elementary charge to be 1.60217653(14) x 10⁻¹⁹ coulombs. Here's a quote from Feynman

"Why didn't they discover the new number was higher right away? It's a thing that scientists are ashamed of - this history - because it's apparent that people did things like this: When they got a number that was too high above Millikan's, they thought something must be wrong - and they would look for and find a reason why something might be wrong. When they got a number close to Millikan's value they didn't look so hard. And so they eliminated the numbers that were too far off, and did other things like that. We've learned those tricks nowadays, and now we don't have that kind of a disease." Feynman lecture at Caltech in 1974

"20For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope 21that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. (Romans 8:20-21)"

We are frustrated, antagonized, confused, coerced, hardened, all the while spitting and shoving and complaining and thirsting for the blood of fairness, that we deserve, that we need our will, our own scheme of righteousness outside the peace that creation has shown us. Next time your hurt, depressed, broken, busted, disgusted, rusted & mistrusted, look to the sky. Look up in the effin sky and remember that your life is but a vapor in the whole of redemptive history. You think your elect?* Start acting like it.

The Cross Centered Life

2007-12-27T15:57:00.000-08:00

I just finished The Cross Centered Life by C. J. Mahaney. I strongly encourage all to pick this book up. While short lived, I found its simplicity to be what my soul had desired. I have tended to turn sanctification into justification. No one is more saved than another!

I also discovered some things about Eschatology and that he backed up in my mind that it is important, but I have realized that it's already over, Christ has won; the end has already happened. The cross is the climax of all of history. Praise God. I pray that I put this book on my shelf, but not its message.

It was a Christmas filled with hospital bills

2007-12-24T18:15:00.000-08:00

You're on the run from the moment you stop dreaming
With the devil at your heels.
Now you feel more capable of heartbreak
With the daylight at your toes.

You wear the marks of his death in your body
With the devil at your heels.
And while your wheels are spinning in the snow
You have daylight at your toes.

But there it goes, leaking through the holes and the punctures in your palm.
It was a Christmas filled with hospital bills but little daylight.

You're reaching out for the foolish gift that dangles
With the devil at your heels.
And you can feel it taking shape in your arms now
With the daylight at your toes.

But then it goes, beaming through the walls and in the eyes of all the ones around you.

It was a Christmas filled with hospital bills but little daylight.

I feel very capable of heartbreak.

Restoration from Timothy

2007-11-13T12:13:00.000-08:00

It's good to walk in life, amen?
The past couple weeks have been great. I've experienced a lot of trial and messy conversations, but that's what I desire. The friendship I have with Chris has been restored and renewed through Christ. To see God change our hearts to burn for His power has encouraged my life more than most things recently. He's there to hold me accountable for things and I trust that Christ is providing us with cleansed hearts to be there to be uncomfortably close in accountability. It's not easy being rebuked, but we are to love rebuke (Proverbs 9:8), and "Those whom [He] love[s], [He] reprove[s] and discipline[s], so be zealous and repent. (Revelation 3:19)" I encourage all to be zealous for the fear of the Lord.
I can recall something from the sermon Daniel spoke on Sunday, which was something similar to, "We are not act then receive, but we have received, so we must act, and do so in joy." This is specifically speaking to our bursting forth in tithe, but it also is spoken in the sense of Christ and the gospel speaking and transforming all areas of our lives. Because He has given His only Son, we must give Him our lives. He was "like a lamb that is led to the slaughter, and like a sheep that before its shearers is silent, so he opened not his mouth... Yet it was the will of the LORD to crush him... and he shall bear their iniquities. (Isaiah 53:7, 10, 11)" He bears our iniquities so we are grateful.
Chris recently directed my thinking to 1 and 2 Timothy. A young man in charge of the church at Ephesus. This passage, to the relief of my conscience, spoke truth to me about the speaker that came last tuesday. And it's an unsettling truth, because I discern that he was a false teacher. How great he will be judged in heaven for the role he has on this earth, and I pray for his soul that he would escape that judgment and recognize his wickedness. His poor public speaking skills were the least of the worries my brothers and I had with this man. His ability to boast in himself was somewhat amazing. The main beef I had with him, was his intense lack of humility and I think that (in the words of certain people I know) is CRUCIAL for a person advocating the scriptures. It was unsettling, but my hope is that Sojourn is not heading in the direction in the wayward direction of death. Pray for us.
With God immersed in my thought, I think it's just extremely comforting (at times) to know that I have a person to care for and have as my companion through these times. I say 'at times', mainly because it is scary. A relationship? It's a big deal. I'm almost blindly embarking with Audra on this journey. I say blindly because I'm not sure what is going to happen. I've never experienced such Christ-centered interaction before from a girl and it's refreshing to know it exists. My main fear is that I'm not available to provide the appropriate amount of commitment that bursts forth when a relationship gets rolling. But I must say gentlemen, it's great. I find myself not having to provide happiness for her, for Christ fills her completely. I praise God first and love Christ first and from that flows love of unconditional purpose. Thank God for His Son, and thank God for Audra Todd.

Our Identity

2007-10-11T19:13:00.000-07:00

As I sit here on my toilet (my apologies), I am struck at amazingly different arenas of thought. I think about community group and where I stand among the people who are within, not in the sense in which I gauge who is spiritual and who is not, well maybe I am guilty of that as well, but I sat tonight and felt very judged. This isn't a normal tendency that I have. I usually feel comfortable within my circle of brethren. I think I am still escaping the ever-present judgment of a close friend. It strikes me hard to think that I cannot feel the courage to speak my mind, but as I have said many times, my fear of man and what he thinks has become something of a burden on my motives. Also, as I strengthen my bond with Christ, I am compelled to look outward, or at least at first, which is fruitful and encouraging. Prayer centered around my Church body and friends is healthy and the necessity to look inward isn't driving my prayer as it has before, or at least, it is not the driving force behind my prayer. I am feeling insufficient. BUT I read an interesting and truth-driven explanation of an attitude that is applicable when dealing with relationships. It cut to the core of what I find very savoring;
Basically, most relationships that fail are due to a lack of identity and worship. Identity meaning who we are, not what our name is and where we live and what we do at our job, but where your heart lies and how you view yourself. This being said, we can see how we shape our identity, is how we treat people. For instance, if I claim to be smarter than you, then I will act accordingly. Any advice you give me will fall on deaf ears. If I tell myself that I think I deserve your respect, I will watch to see if you are giving me what I think I deserve. But if we change that and put our focus to the identity of the man Jesus Christ and Him living in us, we rid ourselves of these motives! We have to see our identity vertically, towards God, and not seek our identity by our relationships or anything else. And when we fail to worship God in our relationships we ascend ourselves to His throne and exhaustively try to recreate others in our own image. We strive and exert ourselves all the time to change people to the way we think we need to, but in reality we are depriving God of His power in our hearts. We turn to unbelief because we think His power is not sufficient to change our friends and family into sheep white as snow, rinsed in the blood of the lamb. We are foolish, but Jesus died on the cross, so that's okay. :)

An attempt at James:

James a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ. To the 12 tribes in the dispersion. Greetings.
Count it all joy my brothers when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him as God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind. For that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord. He is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.
Let the lowly brother boast in his exultation and the rich in his humiliation, for like a flower of the grass he will pass away. For the sun rises with its scorching heat, withers the grass, its flower falls, and its beauty perishes. So also will the rich man fade away in the midst of his pursuits.
Blessed is the man who remains steadfast under trial, for when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life, which God has promised to those who love him. Let no one say when he is tempted, "I am being tempted by God," for God cannot be tempted with evil, and he himself tempts no one. But each person when he is tempted is lured and enticed by his own desire. Then desire when it has conceived gives birth to sin, and sin when it is fully grown brings forth death.
Do not be deceived my beloved brother. For every good gift and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.

The purple is the only part I didn't get out of verses 1-18. I need to get on my A-game. Goodnight all. God Bless.

A Mess Worth Making

2007-10-04T16:33:00.000-07:00

"The Lord saw how great man's wickedness on the earth had become, and that every inclination of the thoughts of his heart was only evil all the time. The Lord was grieved that he had made man on the earth, and his heart was filled with pain. (Genesis 6:5-6)"

It's important to, in the midst of duty, to familiarize yourself with the goal of your life and it's far too disgusting to see your sin in the raw and flirt with it's destruction.

Learning about the friendships that have been destroyed in my life, and seeing them in light of the Lord feels bittersweet. On one side I see the destruction I have caused, the destruction caused by others, my quickness to retaliate, misunderstandings, grudges, resentment, selfishness, self-righteousness, my inability to admit my own sin, and simply pride manifesting itself in various ways. But on the other side, I see love, I see the fruit(joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, gentleness, faithfulness, self-control). I see friendships deeply rooted in the power of Christ Jesus, spurring each other on to rich and deep love for one another, and I see the grace of God, perfect and complete, calling me, whom has filled His heart with pain, to a life in accordance with the will of His son, to be counted righteous through His blood.

The perfect unity of the trinity, Father, Son and Holy Spirit, was broken so that we may have life eternal. Jesus was forsaken so that we may be counted spotless. Amen to that.